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It's that time of the month again wherein everyone's wishing for a better days to come. It's the end of a new month, the beginning of another. We are constantly hoping for October to be better as memories of September plague us as we go on with our lives. But no matter how much we pray for October to be a good month, we'll never really know what it will bring us.

I can't say I'm ready, but I guess I don't really have a choice. We all don't. Whatever happens, the world will move with or without our consent.

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It's been a while since I went put of town with my family, and I pretty ecstatic when my mom told me we were going to Subic because I've been itching to go to the beach for quite some time now. I was a bit disheartened when she told me we were going to Ocean Adventure, but I was excited nonetheless. (Who wouldn't be excited to see dolphins up close!?)

Since we left early, we had breakfast at Jollibee before picking up my stepbrother at Tarlac. After a long drive, we stopped over at Shakey's for lunch due to excessive hunger and bladder problems.

I had a huge lunch which just goes to show how seriously I'm taking my diet.

Then, we headed off to Ocean Adventure.

Say hi to the fishes, dolphins and sea lions!

Although it rained hard and the skies were gray and heavy, it was a good day.

Sadly, there's no telling how long the skies will stay monochromatic.

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My soul is as dry and as barren as the desert. The oases are almost empty, but nonetheless, I drink before I continue to nowhere. My feet are wandering from place to place aimlessly. The sun is too high to see anything, and I find myself constantly blinded by the light.  My knees are weak, and my entire body feels as fragile as glass. Every time the wind blows, I could feel my bones break little by little. I am exhausted beyond belief, and I wish to rest my head and sleep for a day or two. But no matter how much I would like to take a break, I can't. I have to find my way out of this desert because I know it will never rain; there is no place for me here.


And so, I think: How long must I continue wandering?

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I don't know where I stand right now. All I know is that I really like you. It pains me to know that to you, I am no one, just another person you know. The distance between us is tearing me apart. All I want is to get close to you and to get to know you. I want to memorize every scar on your body and the roughness of your hands. I want to know what makes your tears fall and what makes your heart beat as fast as a bullet train.

December, please be kind. Please bring us together. Please let the wind blow away every tear that I am bound to she. I am but a smitten fool who dreams of being close to a man that I can never have under any circumstances.

But that does not stop me from wishing, hoping and dreaming that perhaps one day, he'll invite me out for coffee or tea or for a photowalk along the streets of his hometown.

Please, December. Just this once?

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There is not much for me to write tonight. I am too tired to think about anything, too tired to feel anything. I just want to sleep and lay down in the comforts of my bed.

Good night, lonely universe.